I’m gonna write a post about something spicy.
Part of the reason is because it’s been on my mind. But the other part of the reason is that, as any media-savvy person knows, is that it’s good for business to “stir the pot.” So, even though it’ll stir men’s pots in very different ways than it’ll stir women’s pots, I’ll whip out my stirrer and stir away.
They have a different mindset than regular women. Life teaches them to have a different one. They have different standards. They, having so many men at their fingertips, can afford to be cavalier with the men that come their way. They can discard any man at a moment’s notice, vanishing without a trace, confident in the knowledge that a flock (or gaggle) of other men will be waiting around the corner, from which they can choose another prime slice of fowl.
It’s an interesting mindset to run into. Normal people have learned that, to understand a person, one needs to get to know them and not jump to conclusions. Normal people don’t have infinite choices for mates. So, unlike the way we all can be when it comes to which restaurant to eat at, we benefit from… cutting people a little slack.
Have you run into a beautiful woman who, at the first whiff of imperfection in you, immediately began to treat you as invisible, or worse, like a mosquito buzzing around her ear if you did not obligingly vanish in an instant and forever?
It’s not just about restaurants, for normal people.
Normal people have this problem with many things. Think of movies. Think of television. Think of games. Think of books. Think of music. Think of all the things that we have so many choices to choose from that we have to be LOOKING for ways to judge and discard.
But then imagine what it would be like if it were that way with romance? Imagine, fellow “Normies,” what it would be like to walk down the street and find that every member of the opposite sex, and ten percent of the same sex, just can’t take their eyes off you? Think about how you would have to handle that, and how you would choose?
It reminds me of the few interactions I’ve had with famous-for-intellectual-reasons people. Me? I don’t get much attention, so I assume that giving my intelligent attention to, say, an author with a famous book, would be of value to them.
But, alas, no. My attention means nothing. And if I take up one more second of their time than they feel like giving, they will (while perhaps wishing me well), proceed as though I do not exist.
You see what I did there?
I added two photos of the books by the two “famous” people I’m talking about. One quickly ignored me… while the other treated me like an asshole the moment I phrased something imperfectly. You know: instead of taking a moment to see if there was a misunderstanding.
Which there was.
I’ll leave you to guess which author was which (both interactions happened by email). Guessing games are fun!
Anyway. Wasn’t I talking about beautiful women?
While I am willing to “put on a mask” and stir the pot, I am UNwilling to give the impression that I have a narrow view of beauty. A great many things, women included, are beautiful. And, if you’ve read “Ishmael,” you’ll have already suspected that I might swoon over “primitive” beauty.
Note the quotation marks!
But I should get back onto the topic of intolerance.
It’s not so bad to be intolerant of things that aren’t alive. Movies like “One Hour Photo” with Robin Williams don’t care if we dismiss them unjustly. Videogames like “Just Cause 2” don’t mind if we never buy them. And books like “Winter’s Bone” don’t feel hurt if we never lay our fingers on their textures or even our eyes on their film version’s greatness.
The people behind those artistic projects may mind, may fail to gather the income necessary to make more great art, but the art itself is not offended if we turn away at the box office, game shop, or book store. So we are not… bad people.
Time makes criminals of us all.
I like to think that. If we all had infinite time, wouldn’t we give our time to everything deserving? Every movie? Every book? Every game? Every song? Every person?
But since we don’t have infinite time, nor even enough, don’t we daily battle with personal injustice in the euphemistic name of “following our heart,” or “living our life,” or “doing what we have to do,” or “taking care of our family,” or “keeping our job”? And don’t we have to suppress a great deal of guilt because of it?
I know that when I’m on a dating site and manage to start an interaction with a “beautiful” woman, it’s only a matter of time before the other shoe drops. I’m too much of an odd duck. I’ll trip over one or the other of their million tripwires that’ll make their voices go dead, their communication go silent, and their interest go to the Moon where it’ll asphyxiate in the vacuum. So I just laugh, reciting “The Universe, Man. Hilarious.” to myself, just so that I’m ready.
I know I’m being shortchanged, or that I will be. I know I deserve better. And I know it might be a wonderful learning experience for many people to get to know me, if only they weren’t in such a hurry to discard me.
But it’s not going to happen.
It just isn’t.
There just isn’t enough time for justice to be done to me.
So, instead, I focus on how to do justice to others. Of course, in this sense, it’s impossible. I don’t have infinite time either. Sometimes I fool myself into thinking I can do justice to everyone by sealing myself away from so many people, so much of the World, that I find all of a sudden that I just DO have all the time anyone who wants a piece of me needs. It’s a little pleasure, in the short term.
And, luckily, the “beautiful” things out there, be they women or whatever, are not necessarily where the (or any unusual) value lies. As a monk might say, beauty is everywhere, if only we know where to look.
And where is that?
Why, everywhere. Not just at the beautiful women. Even garbage can be beautiful, as Ricky Fitz taught us in the film “American Beauty.”,
And it doesn’t require beer goggles to see beauty where many can’t.
Why? Perhaps because you’re not seeing the real beauty? Just booze’s beauty?
Can money do it too?
Lemme see if I can find a picture of a beautiful woman kissing an ugly rich man….
Well, “fat” doesn’t equal “ugly,” but sometimes even a Google image search can let a man down.
I’m off track again.
Beauty is everywhere. Being thankful is good for the soul. The World is like a banquet, and we are like starving people. If only we can learn that food is what we need.
But… I do have to admit that, just as when I gaze into the abyss and the abyss gazes back at me, I can’t help but wish that, sometimes, when I stare at a beautiful women, she would stare back at me.
And see me.
Really see me.
A man can only fight Evolution so hard.